It is amazing to think how 2 years ago I had such a helpless feeling and did not know w
hat having peace of mind in body and soul meant.
Now as I look back I can see the cycles of addiction.I felt depressed and was physically run down. Recovery is about fun, playing softball and the enjoyment of being with my family and being a mother to my girls. I did not know what living without stress was like until I started working on my recovery. I know when I’m getting disturbed by my thoughts; I can call someone in recovery and get myself to a meeting. The big difference is that I know that when bad times happen I can deal with them in a way that does not have to be chaotic. I was very exhausted and defeated; I could no longer cry or laugh and knew that I had to change things drastically in my life.
The greatest gift that recovery has given me is that I have a clear understanding of who I am. I do not have to make quick choices and I can be comfortable with myself and where I am in my life. I can be real, feel my feelings and not be afraid of myself. I am astounded that my creativity and focus have returned. The important thing I find is to keep being mindful and be present for other people. Recovery is teaching me how to hold the sacred space for others and notice how I react to other folks. It is so good to
feel real again. Being part of a recovery community is about being part of what is important in life- relationships and connections.